Tribute to a Candle

memories fall

like rain

down the windowpane

listen to the music

see the pictures

hear the words of past conversations

watch the candle as it burns down the years of my life

every object

holds a memory

every word spoken

reminds me of times past

every dark corner

represents the dark corners in me

listen to the silence

the wind hits the glass windows

this night is timeless

I am a glazed doll

kept alive by the heartbeat

of a previous day

are you there?

yes, you are there

you feel it too

the candle holds us in

and keeps us still in time

you are here

but we don't know where we are

there goes another year before our eyes

and where has it taken us?

farther from each other

further from what we know

how many candles have there been before?

we are still in fluid time

I feel spirits within me 

that are not of this world

you are one of them -

the missing link

so close, yet so far

I look,

not surprised to see you in the candle

are you happy? 

even though it isn't the same?

I usually am

the music soothes me

and helps me forget

a third year goes by

what a time it was, huh?

and when will it ever come again?

in the fourth year comes the pain

of separation

I see many good-byes and

few hellos

hello, friend

we begin the fifth year

what is to come?

and what is to pass?

where will it take us?

more broken dreams, crushed fantasies?

more tears?

yes, more tears

I have a lot of things to comfort me

but they don't make up for you

my heart has a crack down the side

which, every once in a while

makes me skip a beat

another year goes by

and I'm getting more skilled at hurting

another year goes by

and haven't we aged?

now, you've got love

now, I've got poems

and the strength to be alone

memories of a sunny day

warm me inside

memories of a day when the world 

was at my feet

and not down my throat

a day when I could easily tell

what was real

and what was illusion

it was simple!  illusions didn't cast shadows

but I've been deceived again

another year goes by

every day is another drop of wax

down the candle

marking the distance between us, now

I put out the candle

and hope for the best

what else can I do?

and another year goes by

- Jan 11., 1984, A.D.